The fragrant Mrs Putter sighs deeply as she inputs data on to a spreadsheet from the parish plan questionnaires.
(And this is before she gets to transcribing people's suggestions on alternative uses for village common - 'flood it and turn it into an ice skating rink, grass it over for polo or use it for dogging').
There is an intake of fresh breath as she pores over the forms and reads:
Question: What is your age range?
Answer: 0-4 years.
Question: How long have you lived here?
Answer: 65 years.
For a moment, Mrs Putter has visions of Benjamin Button hunched up in front of a log fire, dressed in a baby sleep suit and muttering scribble talk gibberish in between sucks on his dummy and a smoke on his pipe.
The Enchanted Village population is getting younger by the hour. There's youth dew in that parish pump.
That's about it.
Love Maddie x
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