Friday, 10 July 2009

There's gold in them there hills

When the most exciting thing to happen in the village this week is a car going the wrong way up the one-way street, a Gold Party at Lady Friend's is a must. It is circled in red on the calendar.

Lady Friend, she of the Jimmy Choos in the recycling bin and stacks of champagne in the fridge, has asked us to take along any old bits of jewellery we no longer want. A gold expert will weigh it and then offer us a fair price. We can enjoy a glass of wine, nibbles, a natter and buy costume jewellery made by a very talented young lady from Axminster.

I don't get invited to things like this very often. Never been a girlie girl, never been a lady who lunches, always too busy working. So I ransack the bedroom to find very little gold, apart from a Jersey milk bottle top, a pair of Monsoon bikini bottoms and an old bracelet from Argos.

The doorbell rings and I leave a grumbling Mr Grigg at home (how hard can it be to warm up last night's risotto?) to be accompanied by Ladies in Linen - Pelly, Darling Loggins, Mrs Bancroft and Night Nurse, who thinks she ought to have brought a metal brief case chained to her arm 'just for safety's sake'.

'What if someone mugs us?' Night Nurse says, as we walk arm in arm along the quiet street, past the nymph statue at the top of the road, the one whose bits are covered only by trickling water and caused such a stir when she appeared overnight two years ago. I swear she was winking.

Posh Totty is late and turns up with Jamie-Lee. They are weighed down like the Brinks Mat robbers. I push my Argos bracelet deep inside my handbag, knock back two glasses of sauvignon blanc and buy a handmade necklace for £8.50.

I know my place.

That's about it

Love Maddie x


  1. I've heard of these parties!! Didn't think I'd meet someone who went to one... wow!!

  2. Your usual charming tale Maddie. Eighteen months ago when gold prices were climbing I sorted through my gold collected over the years. Single earrings, broken chains, signet rings, bent rings, foreign gold (much more than 9ct - more like 18/24) and made contact with a gold dealer online. After our intial online contact we spoke on the 'phone and I put my trust in him.

    I posted it all to him in a jiffy bag and two days later I had a registered letter, perhaps recorded, delivered to my door containing almost £1000.00 in cash with a list with the value of each item based on their weight. He had returned any semi-precious stones from the rings as the weren't worth anything to him.

    I didn't sell at the peak of gold prices and I don't know what they are now but I am about to rummage again and sell any more bits of Broken Gold to a dealer.

    Did Posh Totty sell any gold?

  3. A handmade necklace for 8.50 isn't bad going. I know what you mean about those things though. I once went to a Candle Evening. I left when two women started to discuss the price of getting their wheely bins cleaned out!

  4. I'm terribly impressed Maddie. I'd never heard of a 'Gold Party' until today. I wonder if it could be sneaked into my yet unpublished book. It sounds so upmarket, very G/Jilly Cooper

  5. This sounds like a fabulous idea for a get together. It gives your guests something to focus on and would be a great ice-breaker talking point.

    CJ xx

  6. Jude - I'd never heard of one before, let alone think I'd get invited to one.
    Buggles - you are Balham High Road's Jackie O, so it doesn't surprise me you had such a stash. Good job he was so honest. Good luck with the next lot. And yes, I think Posh Totty sold a bit but not as much as Posh Totty 2, who may feature in future blog updates...
    Reasons - people pay to have their wheelie bins cleaned? When your kids get better, you could offer their services. They could get in them.
    Lampworkbeader - I can envisage the scene now, with maybe some 'bad' sex scene going on upstairs.
    CJ - beats a Tupperware party I guess. I am trying to persuade Mrs Bancroft to organise an acessories party. You each pay a sum of money up front, say £10, and swap accessories and the money goes to charity.

  7. Oh sweetie - I think I would have been just like you...I don't even think I would have had an argos chain to bring along...seriously I don't think I have any gold at all!!! Like that you pushed it back into your bag!!! xxxx

  8. Gold parties are all the rage darling....and also "swishing" parties which sounds dodgy but it's about swapping designer clothes. Not that I have been to either, although I do recall my mum throwing a Pippa-Dee party years ago.

  9. So what was the most amount of money paid out for the jewellery? Come on, spill the beans. Was it posh totty?

  10. MT - I was hard pressed to even find the Argos bracelet. My stuff is junk.
    Gail - Pippa-Dee, now there's a blast from the past.
    D P&M - Posh Totty 2 got about £160. The original Posh Totty was keeping quiet but sank back a few chardonnays in celebration, probably...

  11. Love the characters in your village!


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