Last night, the hall was heaving as villagers left their warm homes on a chilly night to take part in the annual quiz. There were about 90 people there and I am pleased to say our team members excelled themselves and came second. I was personally very proud to have remembered that Malawi was once Nyassaland. I don't think I spelled it right, but there were no extra points for spelling, which was good news.
The winners were a team who should have been called the Smart Arses. A serious lot from the next village, they won it two years ago. But we had been led to believe they would never be back as a protest against the quality of the wine dished out as prizes. But came they did, bold as brass, and they disputed several answers (they were actually correct on one but the adjudicator wasn't having any of it) and when presented with their bottles, very swiftly took them out of the bags to examine the labels. We should have mugged them really on the way out.
We managed to make the food stretch to feed the assembled throng by adding more water to the sausage and bean casserole. The preserving pan became like the magic porridge pot. Very delicious but I swear there were times this morning when the village was about two inches off the ground through all that collective wind released as people went to get the Mail on Sunday.
After the quiz, Mr Grigg and our friend Nobby decided to loiter around Mr St John's house, as he was entertaining a lesbian couple to dinner. Mr Grigg and Nobby came back and reported they couldn't see much through the small window which was fairly high up. But they could see dinner was over and Mr St John and his guests were playing Scrabble. What a disappointment. I think Mr Grigg hoped it would be naked Twister at the very least.
However, not content with peering in from Mr St John's rear windows once, they returned with a broom stick on which perched a scarecrow's paper mache head wearing a panama hat. We all have scarecrows of various states in our garages (this could be the twin village to the one in the Wicker Man, believe me) and this one was pretty scary. After breaking through the security lights of Mr St John and his neighbour, Mr Grigg and Nobby gave a puppet show of sorts with the scarecrow and the window before being spotted by one of the lesbians who shrieked out in horror and then invited them in for a nightcap
Whether the scarecrow on the broomstick was spotted by anyone else, I'm not sure.
That's about it,
Love Maddie x
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